Roseanne Barr on Raising Kids

The way I look at it, if the kids are still alive when my husband comes home from work, then I’ve done my job.

Roseanne Barr on Birth Control

I had one kid with the birth control pill, I had one with the diaphram and I had one with the I.U.D. I don’t even know what happened with my I.U.D. It never came out. But I have my suspicions because that kid picks up HBO.

Roseanne Barr on Feminity

People say to me, “You’re not feminine.” Well, they can just suck my dick.