Jokes by Ted Alexandro

Stand-Up Comedian Ted Alexandro

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Born: January 26, 1970

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Ted Alexandro on Personal Training

My sister is a personal trainer. That’s a touch job. I don’t think I can do that. You have to help people with their fitness goals. “Can you help me define my abs?” “Yeah disgusting, sloppy, gelatinous.”

Ted Alexandro on Downloading Music

Illegal downloading seems to be big these days. That’s gotta stop. It’s a problem. Because when you download, let’s say, a P. Diddy song, you’re not only stealing from him you’re also stealing from whoever he stole it from in the first place.

Ted Alexandro on the War

Lot of debate about the war lately. Democrats saying pull out. Republicans saying finish the job. It’s like the angel and devil on my shoulders during sex.