Robert Schimmel on Dogs
What do you say when your friends come to visit and the dog starts humping their leg. Well, if it’s a pit bull, you say, “You better let him finish.”
Robert Schimmel on Penis Enlargement
They do sell a lot of weird things in sex shops. They have this stuff called Mr. Big Cream. It says, “Rub it on your dick and your dick gets bigger.” Great. Wouldn’t your hands get bigger too?
Robert Schimmel on Blind People
How do blind people know when they’re done wiping their ass?
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Schimmel has one of the dirtiest mouths in comedy, but is a surprisingly sentimental, sincere and, yes, very funny performer when talking about his personal experiences with cancer. The obsession with sex might turn off some, but he’s anything but a one dimensional performer.
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