Jokes by Kevin Pollak

Stand-Up Comedian Kevin Pollak

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Born: October 30, 1957

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Jokes

Kevin Pollak on iPhones

If we do have any iPhone users out there, I have incredibly great news for you. I’ve developed after about six months and finally perfected and it’ll be out on the market soon, an app that you’ll all want. It allows you to make a phone call.

Kevin Pollak on Sodomy

The law against sodomy is trying to stop homosexual men from enjoying themselves. That’s what the law is all about. But this is stupid. What do you do according to the law? You find two men enjoying themselves sexually. You arrest them and throw them in… prison? That outta do it.

Kevin Pollak on Smokng

No one smokes because they like the way it tastes. If we did, they’d make cigarette-flavored cookies, candy, ice cream. “What is this? Marlboro fudge with nuts? Give me a scoop of that, willya? She’s gonna have the Menthol Swirl with the Camel chip.”